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Love Song for a Vampire

I’ve always had a thing for vampires. They’re beautiful, desirable, seductive, alluring. Perfect. The list goes on. But everything about them is attractive. I’m honestly not even close to deterred by the bloodlust.

Vampire teeth

Back in the day I was a big Anne Rice fan. With her dreamy duo of The Vampire Lestat and his dear companion Louis. They kept me enthralled with their tortured existence of love for blood and each other.

Then, when Stephanie Meyer‘s Twilight came into my life it became my bloodline to a romantic tale of young love like I haven’t seen since Romeo & Juliet.

Most recently I found L.J. Smith’s The Vampire Diaries.

The TV tale is far more enjoyable than the books and I get to watch them faithfully every week. Or I can simply turn to my iTunes library whenever I need a feed of fit bods, blood and romance. The Vampire Diaries

In each of these realities there’s always a love so intense it seems impossible that it even exists. I’ve been in love before and each of these authors does a different yet equally delicious job at describing the kind of love I have indeed felt.

But they also describe desire in a way I’ve never experienced: pure, unadulterated, all-consuming passion for the hero/ine. Granted the desire for their lovers is fueled by a nearly uncontrollable urge to kill them, it’s still a desire I’ve never had inflicted upon me. I’ve felt it for someone else but never felt it directed at me.

The more I think about my future life and my significantly smaller self, the more I realise I really just want someone to want me THAT much. I mean, I certainly don’t want anyone to want to kill me or stalk me or actually be obsessed with me. But I do want someone to desire me as much as Edward and Jacob, Stephan and Damon desire Bella and Elena respectively.

But then again, I’m not sure I’ve ever been willing to let someone feel that way Hands in the airabout me. It’s almost like I’ve never felt I deserved it. Not consciously, of course but on reflection there’s been a few self-sabotaging situations that could have resulted in something great. I guess it’s all part of the growth.

Since I’m someone that’s never been anyone’s first choice, it would be nice to have my own vampire-style love affair BEFORE I make my transformation. I’m sure it sounds shallow to want to be wanted that bad. But honestly, I’m pretty sure it’s most fat girls’ fantasy…without the vampires and the killing, of course.


About digitaldivablog

This is the full story of my Slimband journey from the fatness to the fitness and everything in between! I had Lap-band surgery at the Slimband Clinic in Toronto with Dr. Yau in April 2010 and boy has it been an adventure! This is where I tell the tale.


2 thoughts on “Love Song for a Vampire

  1. I’ve been stopping by sporadically to read this blog as I’m jumping through the hoops of getting banded at the moment. Just wanted to say A) Love the blog! You’re honest and funny and it’s interesting to read what you write. And 2) LOVE vampires as well! :0) Personally I’m a purist so can’t STAND Twilight – “The Vampire Diaries” was my favourite series as a kid (only books 1-3 though, 4 was weird and the new ones are terrible and akin to character assasination in my opinion! Anyhow, keep up the good work! I love reading this blog and it’s giving me hope for after my surgery!

    Posted by magikalcrab | December 10, 2010, 22:31
  2. I feel you. Ive loved vamps since i was a child as well. If u haven’t read already and when or if you get the chance Look for a book called CLUB VAMPYRE its by Laurell K. Hamilton. It is by far one of, if not the best vampire stories ever(in my opinion). It has everything from vampire strippers to zombies to paraplegic prostitutes..lol, and i mean that literally. And if you love anne rice i honestly believe that you’ll love this series as well. And for the record, there’s NOTHING wrong with fat girls. Its all in how you carry yourself sweetheart.

    Posted by Thickgurluva | January 6, 2011, 06:30

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